Get it on my mind.

“Get It On My Mind”

Marvin Gaye v. The Pixies (DJ Zebra Mashup)

Did I smoke crack last night?

“Pinball Number Count

The Pointer Sisters for Sesame Street

1976

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12.

I’d like to buy the world a Coke.

“I’d Like to Teach the World to Sing (In Perfect Harmony)”

(Original Coca-Cola “Hilltop” commercial version)

The New Seekers

1971

We’d Like to Teach the World to Sing

A friend of mine is getting married next week (to another friend of mine; we’ve all known each other since high school). Originally, her bachelorette party was going to be a bachelorette weekend, and we planned on spending last Saturday at the beach.

Of course, Deb’s memorial service came up, and so we decided to hold off. So, today, three of us went for a day trip to Wrightsville. After we spent some time roasting our skin, we planned on going back in the water — unfortunately, an enormous school of jellyfish decided to show up and declared Jellyfish Only Swim for about an hour.

Yep, screw that.

As the tide went out, one of them ended up on the sand without any chance of another wave taking it back out. I began to consider what Darwin would think of me if I tried to save the poor bastard. Then, I realized that I could become the God of Jellyfish and this floundering soul could spread the gospel of my mercy.

Having eaten jellyfish before, I felt a bit indebted to the beached animal. I chose to become a merciful god, but only after making the bachelorette promise to pay me $5 if it stung me.

Fortunately, I am not only the daughter of a neuroscientist who specializes in pain research, but I’m very familiar with Finding Nemo. I (bravely) picked it up by its little jellyfish head and sent it to go be with its kind.

How to Save a Life

On the flip side, I failed to recognize that we were encountering cabbage head jellyfish, which do not sting. So, we totally could have been swimming with hundreds of harmless jellyfish. I’m putting that on my bucket list now.

Speaking of bucket lists, check out Alice Pyne’s bucket list / blog.

“well, fuck you and all that jazz as we fall down”

SO, I had surgery six days ago, during which I delivered an bouncing 23-year-old gallbladder that needed to die in a fire. I am on all sorts of medication for pain and nausea and gastrointestinal battles.

Then, a couple days ago, I was put on antibiotics for bronchitis, “walking” pneumonia (emphasis on the “walking” because I cannot actually do much of that), and a soul-crushing cough that probably kills kittens. Now, I have a completely different cold that is evacuating all the snot from my nose.

This is all happening at the same time. Oh, also, a brand new contact broke right after I put it in my eye. My body does not know WTF and neither do I, so I got three songs today. Morning, afternoon, evening. Have a blast — I’m going to take more stuff that turns me into Droopy Dog (1:12).

 

I  think this first song accurately depicts my attitude to my immune system right now.

Fuck You!

Cee Lo Green

2010

The Lady Killer

 

I think the context of this applies, as well. After telling my body to go fuck itself, much like Velma Kelly killed her sister and boyfriend, I decided to dance around like I’d pretty much won and just didn’t care anymore.

All That Jazz

Catherine Zeta-Jones

2002 (original: 1975)

Chicago: Music from the Miramax Motion Picture

 

And finally, this is my Waterloo.

Going Down

The Rayees

sometime between 2007 and 2009

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HOLY FAILURE, BATMAN!

We on a boat!
This is what me and my dumb friends did while I was not blogging. I’m hiding in shame (except for my left arm, which is clearly the shameless arm). Oh, and, in case you were wondering about the sausage fest: there were, in fact, 3.5 women on this boat.

 

Huge update coming soon — I clearly have a lot of backdated songs to do, but I do have them. Song entries for July 4-8th (and possibly 9th) will have a publish date of  0:00 EST on each respective day.

Obbbbviously, I’m sorry for being so slack — but just know that sunburn karma got me pretty good this time. I was on a boat, way too inebriated, and singing Bohemian Rhapsody (including instrumental bridges) and Taylor Swift songs. I didn’t even know that I knew any Taylor Swift lyrics at all, but apparently, I do.

Anyway, once my phone died on the 4th, I couldn’t post via the mobile app anymore (not like anyone had any cell service anyway), and then as soon as I got back to work, I turned into a failure and started working 12-hour days, coming home, having a drink that involved Belvedere, and passing out so cold that I haven’t been able to finish the last episode of Wait, Wait… Don’t Tell Me! despite that being the only podcast I’ve been listening to all week.

So, my dog and I are working late tonight, and I have tomorrow off, so free time should be forthcoming. Onward!

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“is this the real life? is this just fantasy?”

Bohemian Rhapsody

Queen

1975

A Night at the Opera

Basically, THE sickest remix. Possibly ever.

TWO-PART VIDEO EXTRAVAGANZA!

(aka the perfect beginning to my four-day weekend)

“Mashed Potatoes”

KeVinMADe

between 2006 and 2010

Mashed up from:

Tootsie Roll commercial (1984)

Monster Hospital by Metric (2006)

Overnight Celebrity by Twista ft. Kanye West (2004)

Cause I Love You by Lenny Williams (1978)

Hustlin’ by Rick Ross (2006)

Neva Eva (Get On My Level) by Lil Scrappy & Trillville ft. Lil Jon & The East Side Boyz (2004)

Human After All by Daft Punk (2005)

Still Tippin’ by Mike Jones (2004)

In Between Days by The Cure (1985)

I know there’s more in there (especially under Metric towards the beginning, and maybe a couple minutes of Scatman John? Help me out!!

If I don’t have a posting up for the next couple days, I will have three days worth of songs posted by Sunday night.

Have a great weekend!

Set some shit on fire!

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