Your goodbye

“All of Me”

Billie Holiday

written by Gerald Marks and Seymour Simons (1931)

All of me
Why not take all of me
Can’t you see
I’m no good without you

Take my lips
I want to lose them
Take my arms
I’ll never use them

Your goodbye
Left me with eyes that cry
How can I go on dear without you

You took the part
That once was my heart
So why not take all of me

All of me
Why not take all of me
Can’t you see
I’m no good without you

Take my lips
I want to lose them
Take my arms
I’ll never use them

Your goodbye
Left me with eyes that cry
How can I go on dear without you

You took the best
When I take the rest
Baby, take all of me

Thank you for everything, Dr. Hilton Goulson. A friend and a teacher to the end, you’ve made me my best. “Bicycle.”

We’re gettin’ by just fine, living in a daydream by design.

“Daydream By Design”

Gaby Moreno


Illustrated Songs

Don’t forget me, I beg.

“Someone Like You”




I love this so hard. SO HARD.

“Julie-O [Arranged for Beatbox & Cello]”

Kevin Olusola

And one more from Kevin Olusola:

“Ridin’ Solo [K.O.ver]” by Jason Derulo

So, here’s a fun story. As a little kid, I started playing around on my grandparents’ piano after I had the privilege of listening to my grandfather play so often. He’s amazing, and he could just sit down and improvise absolutely beautiful jazz forever. So, naturally, it became my favorite “toy.” I figured out what arpeggios were (though I didn’t know the name for them at the time), and that turned me into an insatiable instrumental monster.

I picked up the clarinet in 5th grade, the bass clarinet and violin in 7th, the guitar in 8th, and I ended up teaching myself enough technical piano skills to get by with reasonable proficiency. The only issue I still can’t get over is reading a bass clef. It’s like my brain just can’t accept moving note values down two whole steps; so if I don’t write the bass clef’s key every measure or two, I end up turning it into double treble.

"The Pianist" by Luke Chueh

So. Anyway. The violin was a very generous Christmas gift from my parents. I had mentioned that I was interested in learning how to play it, and they completely surprised me. Unfortunately, because I was 12, I changed my mind constantly — so I still wanted to play the violin, but I decided I wanted to play the cello more. I took a couple year’s worth of violin lessons, and then high school band became my life.I still wish I’d learned how to play the cello. For several years, my parents bought front-row season tickets to the NC Symphony — something I think they enjoyed, but I suspect my interest in music played a big part in that. I absolutely loved watching the cellists and that emotional, deep, rich sound they have. Unfortunately, I’ve learned that items that are large, complicated, and fragile are pretty much always expensive.

"I will consume everything you own"

Except these -- these are small.

On a related note, I had a marching band nightmare last night. Instead of normal school-related nightmares where I’m completely unprepared for a test or something normal like that, I have nightmares that I’m back in marching band and I don’t know my sets. My last marching band performance was in 2004 — that’s six years ago — and I still have one dream like this pretty much every week.

If you were never in marching band, “sets” are positions and counts in a marching production — so, exactly where you’re supposed to be on the field, when you need to be there, how long you need to take to get there, and how you’re supposed to get there. And it’s all in time to the music. You have to memorize all of this in order to participate, and it’s pretty damn difficult. If you’re dedicated, though — which most marching band kids happen to be (because yes, it is a cult) — you learn them. If you don’t learn them, not only does that make you an idiot, it’s a very public way for everyone to notice that you’re an idiot.

How To Enrage a Band Director

It's easier to be that person than you might think.

Hm. It’s lunchtime… I guess I should do work now.

This has to be my classiest morning to date

“Blue Rondo a la Turk”

The Dave Brubeck Quartet


Time Out


My grandfather and I both love Dave Brubeck, so this is not an unusual song for me.


However, my dreams last night were all narrated by Sir David Attenborough. And while I was watching a BBC documentary last night, it was not narrated by David Attenborough.

“we dig dig dig dig dig dig dig in our mine the whole day through”


Since I apparently can’t locate a source for this song on its own (in the US), here’s the Levi’s commercial that got it stuck in my head.

UPDATE, Nov 24: Found a link to the song featured in the Levi’s commercial.

Heigh-Ho (The Dwarfs’ Marching Song) – Original

Bunny Berigan & His Orchestra



Levi’s Commercial:


Want an MP3 version? Try using with the first video.


At this point, I feel I should mention that I have absolutely no memory of making my last post. Probably because I was, in fact, “totally wasted on Versed,” which is what they used to sedate me while they stuck a tube down my throat on Friday. It would be nice to be that way again. Sedated, that is — not with a tube down my throat.


The Ramones

so did they

Endoscopy was normal (as expected), but I’m having new pain right around the Bubble of Doom on my liver, so that means more doctor time this week. It’s weird to notice a new substantial pain and think, “Hey, this is awesome!” since it might mean there could finally be enough information to explain why I feel like I have a knife in my abdomen.

Plus, every time I need blood work, one of my best friends from high school ends up drawing it, and we get to talk about the baby she’s having… and it blows  my mind that she’s having a baby (she’s going to be an awesome mom). Coincidentally, she found out she was pregnant a week before I came in to get my Depo shot.

That was fun, because the pregnancy test I took right before getting the shot came back as a false positive, and I was in the middle of a “wtf is going on” moment when aforementioned friend realized what was going on and came in and helped me through the “holy wtf, how is babby formed?” moment, while it lasted.


How is babby formed?

actually, no, not "truely sorry for (my) lots"

I should note here that every Father’s Day, I get Mark a “Happy Not Father’s Day” card. We’re not looking into the whole reproduction thing right now — at all — so it’s something to celebrate.

Aaaanyway. The procedure on Friday was my second upper endoscopy, and I can now say with confidence that the sensation that you’re choking on a long metal tube, Matrix-style, is not pleasant at all — nor does it get less disturbing after you’ve experienced it once. I started hallucinating as they finally got enough Versed in me to knock me out (tolerance is high with my other medications) — I saw two squirrels fighting on a table next to me, and I think I said something about it to one of the nurses. I remember that as the high point of my day. Pun intended.


Battle Squirrel

brought to you by: powerful sedatives

The next thing I remember is trying to pull the tube out of my throat because I had just woken up in the middle of the procedure, and a doctor and a couple nurses were trying to get me to chill out while they pumped enough Versed in me to kill a horse. It just put me back to sleep, which means I am clearly more robust and lively than a horse.

Versed has a tendency to supply a bit of amnesia after the it’s run its course, so I don’t really remember this, but apparently I really wanted to go to the grocery store as soon as they decided I was ready for my mother to drive me home. This makes some sense, as I had been fasting since the previous evening and there wasn’t much for me to eat at home. I think I remember trying to describe myself as a Hungry Hungry Hippo.


"Honestly, I was never that hungry hungry."

I have this shirt somewhere. I am not pictured here, however -- don't get confused.

I must have been really obnoxious about my desire to visit the store, though, because I did end up with a lot of food. I vaguely remember being in the parking lot of Harris Teeter beforehand. I think I was stumbling around and slurring my words, and my mom might have said something about me seeming intoxicated and that it may not be the best time to go grocery shopping… that’s all extremely likely, at the very least. She dropped me off back at my house, I think I ate a couple chocolate chip cookies, and then I passed out hard on the couch. I think Mark had already been home for a while before I woke up.

That said, nothing else new or interesting is really going on. I’ve been playing retarded games on my phone a lot, and wondering why I didn’t think to inquire about sick time when I got my job. It’s a new company, so there isn’t any — so, that translates to the elimination of my tiny savings account over the past two months. I’ve yet to go into credit debt, but at this point it sort of just seems like a matter of time. Thank god I made myself get an extremely low credit limit.


Discover card

Does anyone actually own one of these? I've never seen one in the wild.

The whole economy/health care system thing sort of sucks right now, as it turns out. Who would’ve ever seen THAT coming??






do do do-do, do do-do do…

Tom’s Diner

Suzanne Vega / DNA

1990 (Original 1981)

Original album: Solitude Standing

Original a capella version: